Toast in a Wedding: Your Guide on Giving a Memorable Speech

Public speaking is intimidating, and it can be especially nerve-racking when giving a toast in a wedding. Whether you’re the best man, maid of honor, father of the groom, or another loved one sharing a special tribute, finding the best words to say can make the moment memorable — for the right reasons. 

With this guide, you’ll discover plenty of helpful ideas to put your wedding toast speech together. Plus, we’ll highlight the do’s and don’ts of wedding toasts so you hit all the right notes.

What to Include in a Wedding Toast

So you’ve been chosen to give a toast in the wedding. Congratulations! This special honor is a reflection of your closeness with the married couple. Next comes the hard part: how do you put such a special relationship into words? Fear not, we’ll show what to include in your wedding toast — or wedding poem — and share a variety of wording ideas.

But first, here’s a template of what to put in your wedding speech:

• Who you are: Some people in the audience might not know how you’re related to the newlyweds. Be sure to mention if you’re the mother of the bride, a bridesmaid, a best friend, or a family member. 
• A moment of thanks: Take a quick moment to thank the host of the wedding for putting this special event together. 
• Pick a theme or subject: This is probably the hardest part of the wedding speech. To make it easier, think about the couple and which words come to mind when you think of their love. Are they silly? Adventurous? Or maybe fate seemed destined to bring them together against all odds? Figure out what defines the couple and build a speech around that. You can also choose to describe how you witnessed their love story unfold.
• Incorporate memories: Once you know the general theme of what you’ll be saying, think of specific memories that bring the theme to life. The best toasts in a wedding are those that feel personal, so include details where you can.
• Come to a conclusion: Some people — especially those who didn’t plan out a speech — tend to drone on. Avoid this by tying everything together in a conclusion. How did these memories and moments bring you to this day? Answer that briefly and you’ll have a coherent speech.
• Congratulate and wish the newlyweds well: Wrap it up with well wishes for the newlyweds, including a lifetime of true love, happiness, and more.
• End with a toast: Raise your glass and ask the guests to toast the couple in honor of the big day. Be careful when clinking glasses — you don’t want them to shatter!

Toast in a Wedding Wording Ideas

Want to write a great wedding toast? Consider these ideas to wow the wedding guests at the rehearsal dinner or on the wedding day. 

All great writing starts with brainstorming. Before you put pen to paper, ask yourself the following questions to generate wording ideas for your perfect toast:

• What tone do you want? Are you leaning towards writing a funny speech or one that’s sentimental and reverent?
• What’s your favorite memory of the happy couple? Think of a time you shared with them that made you laugh or feel really special.
• What will the couple be like in the future? Imagine where their journey as new spouses will take them. 
• What do you wish for their future together? Do you have any thoughtful advice for a successful marriage you can share?

Famous Quotes for Inspiration

There’s nothing wrong with taking inspiration from famous love quotes and wedding vows. From funny wedding toasts to sentimental ones, there’s something for every style of speech on this list of wedding toast examples. You can feature these wedding toast quotes as the main theme of your speech or weave them in throughout.

• “Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.” – Antoine de Saint-ExupĂ©ry
• “It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” — Rita Rudner
• “The man who says his wife can’t take a joke, forgets that she took him.” — Oscar Wilde
• “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” — Mignon McLaughlin
• “Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get—only with what you are expecting to give — which is everything.” — Katharine Hepburn
• “It doesn’t matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect, as long as they are perfect for each other.” — Good Will Hunting

Tips for Making a Wedding Toast

Whether you want your speech to bring tears of laughter or sentimentality, these tips will help you accomplish your goals. Keep these do’s and don’ts in mind when drafting your speech — and be sure to run it by a friend, relative, or the wedding planner if you want it to be a surprise.

What to Do

With these do’s, you’re sure to give the best wedding toast ever.

• Speak to the couple: While you might know one person better than the other, today is all about celebrating their relationship. Make sure to speak to both of them and include them both in your speech.
• Use good taste: As with all good speeches, it’s important to know your audience. Remember, the wedding might include coworkers, bosses, in-laws, and elderly family members. Use appropriate language and share stories that show the couple in their best light.
• Keep the tone positive: While you can share how the couple overcame difficult times, be sure to keep the focus on the positive. After all, weddings should be happy and fun! 
• Be yourself: The key here is to know your strengths and let your personality shine through. If you’re not a funny person, don’t try to force it. The best speeches feel authentic and real, so stick to who you are when honoring the happy couple.
• Time your speech: Most wedding speeches are around five minutes long. Practice several times before the special day and time yourself to make sure it’s not too short or too long.

What Not to Do

To avoid landing on a list of the worst wedding toasts, here are a few things to avoid including in your speech.

• Bring up exes: Be careful bringing up exes in too much detail in your wedding reception toasts. It’s not tasteful and should be left where it belongs — in the past.
• Drink too much before: While you can have a glass of bubbly before the big speech, be mindful of your alcohol intake. It’s tempting to take shots before the wedding ceremony and sip on a few cocktails while you’re all getting ready. However, these add up and nothing’s worse than a best man speech or wedding toast where the person is slurring their words.
• Wing it: A wedding day is one of the most important events in someone’s life. Don’t ruin it by being unprepared.
• Be hurtful: Remember to keep your inside jokes and stories light-hearted. You don’t want anyone to walk away from your speech feeling hurt. If you like, you can share lighthearted, self-deprecating jokes. Just be sure not to make mean comments about the couple or share jokes they may find embarrassing.

Dream Up the Perfect Speech

Whether you’re writing a father of the bride speech, best man toast, or are related in another way, finding the right words for your speech can feel a bit intimidating. But with these wording ideas, you’re sure to make a wonderfully memorable speech that will be talked about for years to come.

If you’re part of the wedding party, continue browsing our Stationers blog to discover more expert ideas on how to nail down your role on the big day, including tips on planning bachelorette parties and wedding gift etiquette.